MisMatchDotCom

So a couple of months ago, a married friend of mine talked me into what I always said was the unthinkable - online dating. We window shopped for boys the night I joined and I quickly panicked and decided I needed to forget about it for the night. Below are a few of the messages I've received on this wonderful web site in the last couple of months.

Title: If you were a waffle...
...I'd never "leggo". 

Ha, I hope you can appreciate a dumb line like that. I heard it recently and thought it was funny! lol 

So, I see that you like to travel too! Where are some of your favorite places to go? Where are we going first?

While I do appreciate a dumb joke, this was just odd.



A string of messages--
Title: (no subject)
Him: Hi!!

Me: Hey! Sorry I'm just getting this.. haven't been on in a hot minute!

Hope you had happy holidays.. :)

Him:No worries,

The holidays were relaxing for the most part; I hung with family & ate turkey. Now it's time for resolutions and tax returns...haha.

How's 2013 treating you? And do you come out to downtown much? I'd love to meet up for a drink sometime :)

Shawn

Him again after not receiving a response from me: Well THAT was clearly a waste of time.

Sent from the Match iPhone app

Me: Hm.. what was a waste of time? The 4 seconds it took you to message me? I apologize for the apparent time you took out of your schedule to send me a few messages that consisted of a couple of lines. What I won't apologize for is the fact that I do not frequent downtown so I'm not there to get a drink on a regular basis and don't feel that I need to be the one to come to downtown to you to do so. If you would have taken a bit more initiative to request drinks in a convenient location and/or would have tried to be aware of the obvious apprehension that could come along with a dating web site, then maybe I would have responded in a more timely fashion. Ashley

I meannn... honestly- what a douche bag.

Title: Hello and Happy New Year! (VIP Email)

Love your profile and I think you're super sexy and beautiful. 

Would you be interested in having a drink and some fantastic conversation with me sometime? Any new years resolutions I should know about? 

Hope your year is off to a great start. 

John

I just feel that calling someone "sexy" without having ever spoken to them or met them is a bit out of line. Also- why jump right into asking for a drink? I feel like without a few message exchanges back and forth, it's a bit presumptuous to ask for a date.

Title: I remember you...

Didn't notice it at first, and then I realized you look very familiar. I went to school with you way back, even had a crush back then on you, which I'm sure you know, haha. 

That was a hell of a coincidence...your username verified it.

I have no fucking clue who this person was.

Story People

Sometimes the only thing to do is to start looking at
everything again until you forget what you're supposed
to see and actually see what's there.

I hate. . .

. . .girls that shotgun beers. Now I should clarify- maybe it's not all girls that shotgun beers that I think are stupid, but any female above the age of 22 that is still shotgunning a beer to show what she can do is one that  would fall into this category. I give that specific age because whatever is done in college just... doesn't count... and everyone needs one year of wiggle room after we graduate, as we all border that fine line of what's appropriate and what's not after those years of acceptable irresponsibility.

I have personally never shotgunned a beer. Am I missing out on piece of my journey in life? Possibly. But, I knew I'd make a mess of myself if I ever tried, so I left it to the pros - which always seemed to be the boys. In my opinion, that's always kind of a 'boy' thing to do. I feel like if a girl is shotgunning a beer, she's trying to keep up with the guys around her and/or maybe trying to impress the boy she has a crush on. I'm pretty sure no boy in the history of life decided who his wife would be based on the sole reason of how well she tried to keep up with the men.

Now I know I'm not one to be giving tips on how to impress the fellas, but I do feel like this little tidbit would be beneficial for all the ladies out there: no matter how skinny you are, no matter how cute your Forever 21 dress that you have on is, no matter how much makeup you have on, no matter how young and fun you think you still are, and no matter how hard you try... punching a hole in a beer can and then chugging it as you spill all over yourself and potentially slice your lip open is NEVER a good look.

Blanche's side eye says it all.

Thoughts you probably won't like

I will try to keep most of this blog away from any political conversation (because, let's face it - no one agrees on anything), but as I'm watching the Olympics, the announcer just let America know that President Obama called Michael Phelps to congratulate him on being the most decorated Olympian.

While I am happy for Michael Phelps and proud of his contributions to America, I just think that the President of the United States of America has a little bit more to do than make a phone call like that.

#stoptryingtobethe'cool'president  YES. I SAID IT.

While I will NOT go on record saying I don't support our president -- I truly believe that all presidents should be respected by the country, no matter political party -- I just feel like that other, more important, phone calls could have occupied his time in that moment.

Any good Zeta will tell you. . .

I hate everyone. . .

Almost a true statement.

Joan Rivers has an amazing new book out called I Hate Everyone. . . Starting With Me. I meannn.. the concept is pure brilliance.

If you haven't been lucky enough to come across the book, I'll give you a run down:
Joan Rivers calls out all the idiots in America. . . and/or the world. However, this does include herself - so stop hating.

I'm going to take a page out of Joan's book (pun intended) and start my own I Hate Everyone. . . "segment" of my blog. I'll make it label (This will make this "segment" of my blog easier for you to follow/stalk. You're welcome.), and each time someone or something annoys me - I'll add to it. Better check back for regular updates to make sure you're not on my list!

USA! USA!

If you know me, you know I have a penchant for all things British [sigh]. So my regular love for the Summer Olympics is increased this year since it's taking place in London! I've been glued to the TV for the past few days as much as possible soaking up the summer sports.

My favorite Olympic sport by far has always been women's gymnastics. Forty-eight hours ago, it was heartbreaking to watch Jordyn Wieber not qualify for the all-around! Last night followed up with another disappointment of the men's gymnastic team not medaling. Wahhhh.. poor USA!!

However, tonight was an exciting turn of events with the women's gymnastic team winning GOLD!! Cheers!

These girls are awesome and make me uber jealous that my gymnastics career (and by career I mean dance lessons once a week) ended at the age of 10.

And to think. . . I could have won the gold!

What happened while I was away?

Apparently blogspot went CRAY with lots of changes in the past 7 months that I haven't blogged! Remember at the beginning of 2012 when I promised I'd blog more?

Hey guess what. . . Sometimes I break promises.

While all of my lady friends have fabulous things to blog about like their weddings, children, exciting cities, yadda yadda yadda, this Spinster is still spinning her wheels without a whole lot of that. However, I can promise that my life is just as interesting... just maybe not the kind of interesting that is the Internet's business.

What have I been up to in the past 7 months you ask?
1. Finishing up my second year of the best career ever.
2. Making this city (somewhat of) a home.
3. Greeting one of my best girls when she moved HOME to Florida after a two  year stint in Chi-Town.
4. Speaking of. . . A fantastic trip to Chi-Town!
5. . . . and much, much more that isn't at the tip of my tongue at the moment.

Potential promises to more blogging soon. Maybe.

Lessons

"There is a lesson in almost everything that you do, and getting the lesson is how you move forward. It is how you enrich your spirit." -Oprah Winfrey 

Resolutions

A friend of mine posted this online and I absolutely love it! I'm going to add a few of my own side comments for good measure.

Twenty New Year's Resolutions for Twenty Somethings

1. Before you status update, Tweet, Tumble or Instagram, pause and say to yourself, “is it entirely necessary that I share this morsel of thought with my entire social network?”and if the answer is not, “yes, I absolutely must,” then step away from the Internet.  I wish some people would really take this to heart. Granted, everything I put up on the Internets is definitely not worthy of everyone's viewing and definitely not thought provoking, however, one of my favorite things that one of my girlfriend's says about people who use the Internet to express their emotions: "Write it in your journal, or put it in a card."
2. Know which candidate you’re going to vote for in the upcoming presidential election, and know why.
3. Enough with the 14-day juice cleanses. If you want to lose a little weight quickly, eat less and exercise like crazy. If you want to lose a lot of weight slowly, do whatever Jennifer Hudson did.  I feel like we are all enough to understand that crazy diets do not work, but people in their twenties and older still do them.. I'll never understand why.
4. If you really like the person you’re hooking up with and would like them to be your boyfriend/girlfriend, find a way to tell them, and hope for the best. If you don’t and wouldn’t, stop.  More people should take this route, and I should have done so as well in a few past circumstances. What's the worst that could happen?
5. Find a way to save approximately 300 dollars and spend it on a flight to see a friend or family member who lives far away.  Noted! The experience of traveling to see one of your favorite people definitely outweighs three unnecessary trips to Target.
6. Please stop liking the Kardashians, all of them. It’s not helping anyone, least of all the Kardashians.  More specifically, please stop paying ANY attention to Kim. I've actually fallen a little bit in love with Kourtney and Khloe, but Kim has got to be the worst person in America.
7. Spend less than or equal to the money you earn each month.  Going to promise to at least try to work on this.
8. Wear clothes that fit you, especially to work.  HA!!!!
9. Call someone on the phone at least once a week, and speak to him or her for at least ten minutes.
10. Start preparing now to get over the fact that Facebook is probably going to change again in six months. You’re not going to deactivate your account. You don’t know how.  I also don't know how to unfriend people or restrict them from my profile information. It's getting a big ridiculous... oh, look - there I go complaining about Facebook.
11. Wait 30 seconds before you look up a fact you can’t remember on your phone, and try to remember it using your brain. This is what the olden days were like.
12. Replace one terrible reality show you’re currently watching with one wonderful scripted show currently available on television.  Swap suggestion: Real Housewives of Anywhere for HBO’s Enlightened.  Unfortunately I can't follow this one. The RH franchise has sucked me in and I don't have much room in my life for anything else to watch.
13. Try that food you think you don’t like but have never actually tried, unless it’s brussels sprouts. They really don’t need any more attention.  I'll never understand why people hate on brussels sprouts. They're delicious.
14. Cut one person out of your life who you truly do not like and add one person who you truly do. Note: not on Facebook, on Earth.  I think I'm finally at a point in my life where I truly enjoy everyone in my life. I think... I'll have to get back to you on that because now tomorrow I'm going to get a phone call from that one person I really want to cut but can't seem to find the scissors to do it and I'll remember the fact that there are still people in my life that I truly do not like.
15. If you’re still blacking out regularly, you should stop.  Who said 2012 meant not having fun?
16. Volunteer once over the next 90 days.  You’ll feel really good about it, and probably end up volunteering again over the next 275.
17.  Tell someone who you love that you love them on a more regular basis. To their face, not in a text.
18. Back up your entire online life onto an external hard drive, especially your photos.  This is something that I seriously need to work on.
19. Crap or get off the pot. This applies to whatever thing you’re not doing that you should just sack up and do already.  Wonderfully said.
20.  And in the eternal words of Tom Haverford, “TREAT YO SELF!”  If you have never watched this video, do it now. And seriously, treat yo self.

Do I have to go?

Back to work and reality tomorrow after a very nice, long break! I spent it relaxing, sleeping in, and catching up with some fantastic people. It feels like the two weeks went by extremely slow, which was alright with me!

Along with the reality of being back to work, I'd also like to get a good routine down of working out at least a few times a week (pray for me?), and actually COOKING my dinners at home. This will hopefully save me money and calories! I've already cooked the last two nights at home, which I promise you is an accomplishment for this Spinster.

Last night I had my New Year's Day staple of cabbage, black beans, and cornbread, and tonight just some leftovers with mac & cheese and a hot dog. Maybe it wasn't anything extravagant, but I hate to make dinner so it's a big deal for me!

I've been collecting lots of recipes on Pinterest lately, and making sure they are all realistic for me. When I see just one spice that I don't have, or an item that I wouldn't know where to look for in the grocery store, I move on. I should probably get over my phobia of making anything with more than three ingredients, but... baby steps. I am excited because I received one of those recipe exchange chain emails and this time I finally participated. I passed along a fantastic pizza dip that I had at a Christmas party a few weeks ago -- the best part, it's super simple!! How simple? you may ask...


Pizza Dip
1/2 lb sliced pepperoni
2 8oz pkgs cream cheese
2 cans condensed Cream of Celery Soup
Cut pepperoni into quarters; add cream cheese and celery soup (do not dilute).
Put in Crock-Pot on low and cook for at least 4 hours, stirring often as it begins to boil.

It's done when the cream cheese turns orange from the pepperoni.

New Year, New Shoes!

I've been promising myself forever now that I'll start working out, or at least get back to walking on a regular basis, or do SOME sort of physical activity. The only pair of shoes that I have to work out in right now are beat! I've had them for probably 5 or 6 years and they are some bulky Asics. I decided to treat myself to a new pair of running shoes in order to help with my motivation to get active. I've looked all over because a) I'm picky about what I like, b) I'm really cheap when it comes to this kind of stuff. I don't want to spend more than $50 on running shoes that, let's face it, won't get a ton of use. (At least I'm being honest with myself.) So yesterday, I ventured to Kohl's with my sister and just happened upon this pair that I loved! They were also only $44, what a steal! Here's to hoping I get some good use out of them in 2012!

Leaping into 2012

Well, well, well... look who took another sabbatical from blogging! I was catching up on reading my best girl's blog last night and felt the need to catch up with my blog as well.

Cheers!

It's currently 6:16 p.m. on New Year's Eve and I'll soon be prepping for a night of love and laughter with some friends to ring in 2012 on a positive note. In the past hour I got to thinking about all of the many things that happened in 2011 that change my whole life and many of the fun and exciting things I was lucky enough to experience. It made me realize how much of a lucky girl I was in 2011 and I'm crossing my fingers that I'll be just as blessed in 2012.

1 - I took some fantastic trips this year! Nashville, Chicago, Louisville, New York, and Las Vegas. I experienced these cities with both friends and family and each trip created some amazing memories.
2 - I came into my own in my new career and allowed myself to fall madly in love with it. The school I was at last year was rough and the group I had was probably one of the toughest to handle, but about midway through the year (and especially after that dreaded FCAT), I realized how great I am at this and what an amazing decision I made to follow my heart and go into teaching. The students I had last year taught me as much as I taught them and they'll forever have a huge place in my heart. Leaving them at the end of the school year was absolutely heartbreaking, but I feel so lucky to have had them as my first class.
3 - I met a boy who, while he's no longer in my life, showed me that I am deserving of a lot. While going our separate ways was inevitable, he's one of the best treasures I've ever found and treated me like he felt the same.
4 - I became a godmother! It meant the absolute world to me when one of my very favorite people asked me to be the godmother to her son. Lucas is the most precious little boy in the world and it's such a special feeling to be a part of his life.
5 - I moved to a new city (sort of). I'm experiencing my 'hometown' (I don't know that I'll ever consider it my hometown as Louisville is what my family considers our real home) in a very different way than I ever had before. I moved back after getting a job at a school over here, but I only ever lived here with my parents and knew nothing about life outside of their home. I'm living in a bustling part of this city and it's exciting to see all the things I haven't experienced before, even though I had lived here for 12 years before college!
6 - I got a job that many teachers dream of. While I'm still trying to love my new school, it really is in a fantastic location and I've had a lot of opportunities to develop myself and leadership more into the world of education.
7 - I saw Garth Brooks in concert. "Just put me in a coffin and bury me," were my exact words to my dad when I called him to thank him for getting us tickets to see my ALL. TIME. FAVORITE. singer... IN. THE. WORLD. Being six rows away from Garth Brooks, in an intimate concert, was one of the very coolest experiences that I'll ever have.

There are a bajillion other things I could list. But thinking about all of these things helped me to realize that 2011 really was amazing and that there are probably many more amazing things in store for me in 2012! I'm excited for the future and all that is to come!

No idea

Lately I've developed a sick obsession to Pinterest. Last night I stumbled across the thumbnail of this quote and I couldn't help but fall in love with it --

How true it it for everyone that has become important in your life.

Literally, CANNOT get enough of this song!

Same old story, but lots of new details

It's been a while AGAIN.. I know. Sorry to all of my millions of fans and followers who anxiously await these fantastic posts. :)

Well life sure has taken me for a ride as of late. Mid-summer I was offered a teaching job at a school in Orlando and it seemed like a very good opportunity compared to where I had been teaching. I accepted and was immediately thrown into looking for a new place to live and planning a move in the middle of vacations and trying to soak up my summer and life in Tampa as much as possible. All of this happening without really thinking -- oh shit, I'm leaving my whole life behind.

Yes, of course it's not a long distance. Thank goodness I can go see my friends whenever I want, but after living in one city for almost 9 whole years and then leaving can really be a bit traumatizing. I was too busy preparing for my new life to really realize that there was going to be a new life. I looked at all of the positives and tried to ignore that voice in the back of my head saying "Bitch! We aren't ready for this kind of change!" The week before the move I was on vacation in New York, pretty much moved right after I came back, and immediately after the move I started work that Monday. I was busy enjoying my new work environment and getting my new apartment set up and still not allowing myself to listen to that voice searching for my attention, still calling out to me, "This is a lot of change homegirl, you betta reckanize." (Yes I do get sassy inside my own head on the reg.)

It wasn't until I actually went back to Tampa to visit a friend in town 3 weeks after my move that it really hit me. I don't live here anymore, holy shit. And again, people may wonder why it's such a big deal... but this little lady does not like change. I was comfortable. I knew everyone around me. I knew my surroundings like the back of my hand. It was my home. It broke my heart to drive past my old apartment complex, to go to the bars I used to frequent on an almost weekly basis, to know that everyone I was seeing was able to stay there - in our old routine - and I had to leave in a couple of days. Once I got back to Orlando I was almost devastated. I couldn't stop feeling like I'd made the biggest mistake by moving to Orlando, the place I technically grew up and was supposed to be 'home' for me. It was a very rough week of trying to convince myself that it would all work out and it's all happened for a reason.

My affection for Tampa is so strong because I feel like that is the place I actually grew up. I went to college there, met the best friends in the world, met the boys I loved and lost, experienced firsts of almost every kind, and really grew into and became a person I am so proud of being based on everything that was experienced and happened there.

It's been, and still is, a rough transition. It's been just over a month since my move. I still miss my old apartment, my comfort of knowing that city, my bars and nightlife, and of course my friends in Tampa. However I'm slowly forcing myself to adjust. Luckily I have been able to see the bright side of my career opportunities at my new school, and decided to take serious advantage of the friends and family that I do have here in order to build upon the life I left behind.

You'll Never See a Post Like This Again

Anyone who knows me know that I very much dislike Jennifer Lopez, and that's putting it nicely. However, I ran across an article on People about why she walked away from her marraige. This is what she had to say:

"Sometimes we don't realize that we are compromising ourselves. To understand that a person is not good for you, or that that person is not treating you in the right way, or that he is not doing the right thing for himself – if I stay, then I am not doing the right thing for me."

For anyone who has been in a relationship that compromises who you truly are, this is a strong sentiment. I've been in that place before and wish I would have been strong enough to look inside myself enough to know I was compromising who I was at the time. Somtimes you don't realize it until way too late. Good for J.Lo! (and that's the only nice thing I will ever say about her.)

Friday Night Anecdote

I was at happy hour on Friday with some friends and the bartender didn't like the way I was holding my cup as I was standing at the bar waiting for him to serve me so he took it and threw it across the bar. My reaction was to say to him, "that was very unprofessional of you."

I thought it was funny. Douchebag.

I Love This Woman!

Bethenny Frankel is someone I have come to admire greatly! She is a strong woman who says what she feels and stands up for herself with no apologies for who she is.

Instead of reading A Place of Yes, I've gotten the book on CD so that I can listen on my many drives across the state I've been doing as of late! It's got an amazing message and many great points that every woman can benefit from. I'm mid-CD set at Rule #5 of 10: All Roads Lead to Rome. This rule basically states that everything that happens, whether good or bad, leads to the next thing and eventually no matter how bad one situation may be, it leads to a better road. I've experienced this to the extreme in the past year and will testify that this rule is completely true! Two of my favorite quotes from this section are: "Just when I thought I'd gone the wrong way or messed it all up beyond repair, something happened that made me see it was all for a reason," and "You just never know when a seemingly random decision will reset the course of your life."

I Don't Want to Be a Bride

The prettiest song I've heard in a VERY long time, with a message I can't help but fall in love with.

“What about the other side of the argument?” she said, referring to the hundreds of songs women sing about wanting to get married. “What about if it’s more about what love is? And what it can be? And it has nothing to do with the confines or the tradition of any of that?”
Elle magazine with Vanessa Carlton (http://fashion.elle.com/fashion/insider/2011/07/25/first-listen-vanessa-carltons-new-song/)

I like your company, got a fresh philosophy
Never knew such a gentleman
You can take me on a cheap vacation
I don't want to have expectations
Cause you could be the end of me

And I don't need a house on a hill
A swing on a tree, a grandfather clock
Porcelain for tea, a garden with rose and jasmine

Gonna get drunk on a bottle of wine
No better way to pass the time
Forever by your side

But I don't wanna be a bride
Apologies to your mother
I wanna be your girl
And spend this life with you
But I don't wanna wear white
You know it's too late for that
But can't we keep the ever after, love
Or could it be?

Don't need no golden ring
It'd be no match for the love you bring
From London to Tennessee

We could catch a train to another life
On a whim under the moonlight
I promise you, will you promise me?

Our last names on a wooden sign
Arm in arm where the river starts to wind
Forever by your side

But I don't wanna be a bride
Apologies to each other
I wanna be your girl
And spend this life with you
But I don't wanna wear white
Oh you know it's too late for that
But can't we keep the ever after
Or could it be just you and me?

Ah, ah, ah...

We will live like kings under lavender skies, skies
We will live like kings under lavender skies, skies

We built a poem, we kept a rhyme
Wrapped our love in golden twine
We wrote, we wrote a legacy
Just you and me

We will live like kings under lavender skies, skies

We will