Taking Friday off? Best. Decision. Ever.
The reason behind this is two-fold:
1. I was entirely too hungover to even function to come to work Friday.
2. I needed to work off a bit of shame from the night before.
Our party was at one of my boss' homes. A gorgeous house; very fancy. OOMA was my date (shocking, I know!) and I told him I wanted to get there in plenty of time to enjoy the open bar. The open bar was lasting all night. The party started at 7:00 p.m., but we got lost and the directions on both of our phones weren't working so we ended up there about 7:30; dinner was at 8:00.
When we arrived, I think OOMA was a bit nervous and I was just stressed out from life in general so we headed straight for the bar. I had 3 glasse of white wine in the 30 minutes before dinner. Not a smart move.
At dinner it all hit me at once, yet I told our waiter to be sure my glass was full at all times. Apparently I was 'hilarious' at dinner, according to OOMA. I pulled out my iPhone to play 'NSync's "Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays" because I was bored with the Josh Grobin Christmas CD playing in the background. I told my co-workers that I'm girlier than them and specifically apparently told one that she wasn't very girly at all. I'm sure there was MUCH, MUCH more that I'm missing out on.
After dinner and gift exchanges (who got what? I haven't a clue), we all gathered into another room where I had a conversation with one of my gay bosses (you know I love the gays so of course I work for TWO) where I think I remember mentioning something about my gay boyfriends, but I have no idea if I really did or not. I think I may have also shared that I'm going back to school. Neither of those topics would be amusing to him so I sure hope I didn't go there.
While there were just four of us left as guests and our hosts (other gay boss.. love) remaining, I apparently (and this is confirmed by a co-worker) told my boss that "all the gays are invited to my wedding." According to her story, he ran away. He must not have been too upset with me though because, according to another story, when I was walking out, we were hugging and almost fell into a fountain in front of his house. Now that would make for some nice employee bonding.
Somehow OOMA and I got home safely (thank you Jesus). I passed out on the couch while he had a party with himself in my kitchen. Somewhere in the night I moved to my bed and when I got up in the morning I walked into my living room to find what looked like we'd had all our friends over. I have no idea how one small apartment became so messy in the matter of a few hours.
So I layed in bed, stomach in pain- wondering what happend the night before, wondering if I'd have a job on Monday, wondering who I offended, wondering how we made it home safely. I decied a shower was necessary to try to feel a bit better. As I get ready to shower, I felt it coming... and there it was. In my bathtub. The evidence of the night before. Gross, I know. I cleaned it.
I was terrified to come into work Monday after the stories I'd heard from my behavior Thursday. I didn't do anything completely out of line, I was just loud, which everyone is used to. But I had no idea what my side conversations consisted of, and I had possibly offended one of my bosses in regards to his personal life.
Luckily, I still have a job. And luckily, I have learned to stay SOBER at all future work functions.
The only reason I'm sorry I no longer work there is that I missed your performance. Which, girly-girl, had to have been EPIC!
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