MisMatchDotCom

So a couple of months ago, a married friend of mine talked me into what I always said was the unthinkable - online dating. We window shopped for boys the night I joined and I quickly panicked and decided I needed to forget about it for the night. Below are a few of the messages I've received on this wonderful web site in the last couple of months.

Title: If you were a waffle...
...I'd never "leggo". 

Ha, I hope you can appreciate a dumb line like that. I heard it recently and thought it was funny! lol 

So, I see that you like to travel too! Where are some of your favorite places to go? Where are we going first?

While I do appreciate a dumb joke, this was just odd.



A string of messages--
Title: (no subject)
Him: Hi!!

Me: Hey! Sorry I'm just getting this.. haven't been on in a hot minute!

Hope you had happy holidays.. :)

Him:No worries,

The holidays were relaxing for the most part; I hung with family & ate turkey. Now it's time for resolutions and tax returns...haha.

How's 2013 treating you? And do you come out to downtown much? I'd love to meet up for a drink sometime :)

Shawn

Him again after not receiving a response from me: Well THAT was clearly a waste of time.

Sent from the Match iPhone app

Me: Hm.. what was a waste of time? The 4 seconds it took you to message me? I apologize for the apparent time you took out of your schedule to send me a few messages that consisted of a couple of lines. What I won't apologize for is the fact that I do not frequent downtown so I'm not there to get a drink on a regular basis and don't feel that I need to be the one to come to downtown to you to do so. If you would have taken a bit more initiative to request drinks in a convenient location and/or would have tried to be aware of the obvious apprehension that could come along with a dating web site, then maybe I would have responded in a more timely fashion. Ashley

I meannn... honestly- what a douche bag.

Title: Hello and Happy New Year! (VIP Email)

Love your profile and I think you're super sexy and beautiful. 

Would you be interested in having a drink and some fantastic conversation with me sometime? Any new years resolutions I should know about? 

Hope your year is off to a great start. 

John

I just feel that calling someone "sexy" without having ever spoken to them or met them is a bit out of line. Also- why jump right into asking for a drink? I feel like without a few message exchanges back and forth, it's a bit presumptuous to ask for a date.

Title: I remember you...

Didn't notice it at first, and then I realized you look very familiar. I went to school with you way back, even had a crush back then on you, which I'm sure you know, haha. 

That was a hell of a coincidence...your username verified it.

I have no fucking clue who this person was.